i've wrote about N in my previous entry... errr somewhere last year.
She was my best fren.. udah la umah dia kat belakang my house je, satu kelas dari drjh 1-6, masuk asrama sama2... n satu U lak tu.. tapi dia masuk dulu la sebab dia cerdik banyak dari saya..
Senang cakap, we grow up together.... and her family is like mine too..
Due to something yg saya ingin sangat lupakan, we didnt as close as we used to... it was painful i might say...
Ana is her youngest sis. sangat manja dan comel... dan.. always there when i went to her house...
After much thought, we (my mom and 2 neighbours went to the hospital yesterday... despite i dunno how the hell to go to University Hospital.. kat KL lak tu... I have battled with my conscience whether I should go or not.
Make short we managed to reach there safely with the help of et and jie. (couldnt thank u enuff guys!!)
Ana was still unconscious at that time.. we took turn visiting her. All her siblings were there too. I wont describe Ana coz somehow i'm sure she dont like it .., if only she could speak out her mind.
According to N, the doctor had call the family. Ana was badly injured internally and her brain has shut down.. (seriously i dunno what that supposed to mean)... the pulse rate grew weaker too.. there's nothing much they could do...
" err.. u know... if anything i could help.. just tell me ok.." that was sincerely from the depth of my heart ok...plus i really dunno wat to say..
"aku pun x tau... kalau boleh tolong... tolong la kasi Ana sedar semula... tu je yg aku nak sekarang".. said N, while maintaining her composure..
it was heartbreaking. somehow i forgot apebenda yg menyebabkan our frenships turned sour..
n today et and i went to hotsprings.. as usual we left our handphones in the car.. later, bila dah abis mandi, nak balik... there.. N miscalled abt 3 hours earlier..
Ana had left us...eternally.
when we were small, masa saya asyik pegi rumah diorang, kadang2 makan2 sambil tgk tv sekali... never once crossed my mind that she'll "go first"...
masa dah besar2 ni.. bila g beraya umah diorang, makan2 and tgk tv sama2, x pernah terlintas yang satu hari saya akan menanti ketibaan Ana buat kali terakhir..
Over these incidents i learnt that... memang betul la hidup ini hanyalah pinjaman.. . Dia pinjamkan seseorang untuk kita berkasih sayang, dan tiba masanya Dia ambil balik.
Masih terngiang2 lagi Makcik Limah cakap in between her routine bisikkan kalimah ke telinga Ana, " Dah lama dia x balik, selalu telefon aje tapi kebetulan dia cakap dengan ayah dia je, xder la plak makcik pegi angkat telefon, dia selalu kirim salam aje.. x tau nak jadi macam ni.makcik x mintak banyak... janji dia sedar, macam mana keadaannya pun makcik terima, biar makcik jaga dia."
Makcik Baskiah summed it all very very well when she said, "bila tgk Ana, rasa macam iskk tak lalu hati nak tgk, tp bila kenangkan semua ni dah janji Dia.. rasa lembut hati ni.."
Memangla berat mata memandang, berat lagu bahu memikul..
The late Ana will forever deeply missed by all. Al-fatihah.